I'm Not Depressed - I'm Emo

Jane

Mon, 04 Aug 2008 22:14:31 +0200

Theres a boy in Jane friendship group called Edward.
She's never really liked Edward all that much, He's the kind of guy where if you don't agree with him he will call you an idiot and down play your point until you just get fed up and leave him feeling smug like he's won. Yet some how everyone turst him and Jane is contastly told by Alex "You would to if you'd seen him with Eddy." So now as Jane watches him join the inner group she feels her self getting fed up with his contastant bitching of other members.

Take Alice.

Jane's never really been close to Alice but the few times shes talked with her she was nice enough, then one day when talking with Alex, Joe, Lilly and a few other member of the inner group about another member who just likes to pick on everybody, Edward comes over and starts bitching about Alice. Now Jane, can accept Edward coming to complain about Alice having a fight or maybe fool mouthing around youner ones, but he just strolls in and starts to bitch about what she does and how she whines if you don't agree with her (much like a certain male who's name begins with E, ends with D and has the letters dwar in the middle) and then processed to say she desevers any attacking she gets.

Right now, Edward needs a punch in the face and Jane might just be the one to give it to him.
Feel sorry for Jane?
I don't.
Bitch.

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Silence

Sat, 02 Aug 2008 18:21:31 +0200

I'm begining to wonder if what my mum say's is true.
I can't do anything right.
What am i ment to do when a friend tells basically tell me I'm not going a good enough job and he wantsme to do it another way - a way that will take hours and probally wont sound right by the way. Not only does he tell me this, I find out he talked to my other friend about it behind my back and basically said I was going to do it wether I liked it or not.

Reading back on that, it sounds a lot like I'm talking about sex... I'm not...

It's just... I'm trying to do alot to help out this friend and then to be told that the one thing I can do isn't good enough... I dunno why I bother.
The more I think about it, the more it feels like I'm falling apart with my friends.

Is it ment to be like this?

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Jane

Fri, 01 Aug 2008 20:20:22 +0200

Joe.
Ahh, Joe. Jane would never tell anyone about Joe. What she felt for him or how she thought of him, No it could never go anywhere. Joe was a year older - a student - and also, taken. Sandy was someone Jane had never met, nor had any wish to met, knowing that when she finally did her self esteem would sink even lower and she would hate her self for hating such an amazingly nice girl. Though it didn't seem like Joe was in love with Sandy, Jane got this vibe that he was very much so, despite the number of friend in the group who though Joe and Alex where a little... closer, then best friends should be. Jane had to admit she was a little... Very jealous of Joe and Alex's relationship, however, with her donkey laugh and overly loud voice (coupled with a tendency to take things a bit to far - in the annoying way, not the bad way) she knew she could never pull of the cool calmness the Alex seemed to pull of with such ease. While everyone like Jane, everyone trusted Alex.

But Joe.
Joe. Jane had thought it over so many times in her head. The boy was handsome, she was barely passable as cute. He was suave and funny, Jane... well she was only funny to herself. Joe was rich. Well she believed him to be, though it wasn't always clear how rich and she never felt inclined to ask. She didn't care about the money (though, its always a bonus right?) no, it was the class difference that came with money. Joe was the smart, privet school lad, with a grate sense of style and could look good wearing a bin bag. Jane was... well she just wasn't. Jane was the kind to daydream in class and miss the point, the one to pick up what ever was on her floor unless she was going out with friends, and she had to work to look presentable - which wasn’t easy since her skin sucked, she was 16 stone and hated make up with a passion.. oh and her hair was frizzy and took an hour to straighten on a good day.

Joe.
No Joe was out of her reach and destined to stay as a best friend. Jane would just have to stick to e-mailing her lover, Ollie, in America and pretending she still loved him as much as he desperately loved her for fear of braking his heart and then getting lonely and running back to him with fake lust. Ollie dissevered much better then Jane and Jane wanted so much more then Ollie...
Do you feel sorry for Jane?
I don't.
Bitch.

Comments

Jane

Fri, 01 Aug 2008 03:52:28 +0200

Let's say there’s a girl called Jane.

Jane is a nice girl, not popular, but not such a social reject that she gets the crap kicked out of her. She has a nice clique of friends who she is comfortable with and can smile and have fun with when she pleases. Jane also has a best friend Whom she loves dearly names Alex, short for Alexandra. Now Jane find her self on holiday for awhile and come back to find her best friend hanging with a new crowd. She doesn’t mind though since the group seems cool enough and though there is talk of a a old drama the group seems friendly and stable. Jane quickly makes friend with a guy named Joe and the groups "queen bee" Eddy. Everything's going fine until Eddy starts to stop people from going out without him. He starts making some of his outer school friend join the group, one who stand by his every decision. Jane takes another holiday and come back to find the group in ruins. Joe, having had enough has picked up his bag and left taking Alex and fair few others with him. Jane feel's torn between the best friend she's had forever and the slightly broken Eddy she finds left behind. She follows Alex but reassures Eddy that she understands... Until Eddy disowns her for her decision.

Jane becomes a wreck, refusing to talk about Eddy, while trying to calm everybody down about the situation. Finally Joe and Alex seem to relax and the other friend Lilly decides to form a new clique involving those of the 'Eddy era'. Many more are disowned by Eddy because of this but Jane seem calmer when out of the firing line. A few weeks pass and Jane slowly climbs up the groups ranks to join her best friends Joe and Alex... and she lets her slide into the casual bitching that surround the eddy era, however rare it is... Then they notice something... Every plan they make.. Eddy copies... They go to see Hancock, He goes to see Hancock. They make a website, Eddy makes a website. They make a podcast, Eddy makes a podcast, changing his website to make it look like he came up with the idea before them.

Jane feel her self filling with pain, anger and sheer disappointment for unknown reasons and it starts to tear her apart. Wondering why Eddy, a boy 2 year her senior, would want to copy the move of a bunch of teenagers. Suddenly doing everyday things isn’t fun anymore. Going to the cinema loses its excitement, The website become more of a chore, The podcast feels samey.

Jane cries her self to sleep, even though she knows she shouldn't.
Do you feel sorry for Jane?
I don't.
Bitch.

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